I had two brothers ask me if I was there looking for a sister. The last time I got that question I told the brother. 'Yeah...do you have any sisters ?" I hated that.
Classic!!!! LOL Reminds me of the old Ice Cube song, "Get Off My #$## and Tell Yo B##$# To Come Here!"
That began my fade. I stopped the book study. I'd miss one or two. Then maybe a week or two. Alot of times missing so many I was ashamed to go back because everyone would give you that look. Then my theorcratic ministry school went next. Followed by missing sunday meetings. Being that I could barely communicate I think most thought I went back to english and vice versa. In the end I realized no one really cared. I felt like I knew who were real friends and weren't. And here I am. My cards are in spanish, and that was the last congregation I ever attended
I don't know if it can be said or not, but this sounds like the perfect way to fade!! I think you just provided me with a blueprint!!! On a serious note, I don't think it's with malice that JWs show a lack of interest in one that's fading to the point of negatively stating who is and who isn't your friend, although don't get me wrong as I defintately get what you're saying. I think it's simply the way the organization has everybody on this hamster wheel. You really don't have that much time to worry about someone falling off the radar because you're so paranoid about your own so called spirituality which really means your own standing, in other words what other dubs think about you.
I can relate to you on the music thing and expanding your tastess. I'm glad I got exposed to rural and suburban white dudes as it opened me up to some great music. About a month ago out in field service I was working with a 50ish white brother and he's a little bit of a burn out. He was a convert, but he was one of those long sideburn, long hair muttonchops rock-n-roll type fellas in his youth before he converted to JWs. After a householder told us that he wasn't interested in the literature and closed the door, before walking off the porch, dude started playing air guitar immitating Back In Black by AC/DC. I'm glad to say that I was exposed to that kind of music so that I could relate to the emotions he was expressing about that kind of music.
The congregation I'm at right now, I feel really lonely, and a lot of it has to do with what I know and what I've come to believe. Some days I'm sorry I ever came to this site or FreeMinds, or ever heard of Ray Franz. It wouldn't have been so bad had I been able to leave the religion without any major fallout. As of now I feel like an enemy agent and at times it leaves me hollow, like who am I and where do I belong. A couple people close to me in the hall know I'm flirting with the idea of going to another congregation and they've made it clear that the hall won't be the same without me. Whether that's just talk, I don't know. I view it as one monkey doesn't stop the show. My plan is to resign, transfer to another hall, and mind my business.
In the meantime though, our congregation is really diverse with equal amounts of white and black. Plenty of children and a couple babies which is nice because it adds life to the congregation. For the longest we didn't have any children, nor any teenagers, now we have a plethora of kids, still not too many teenagers, but some preteens. Our pioneers are pretty chill with a couple gung-ho arrogant types, the elder body is pretty old and unmotivated, the Ministerial Servants are content to remain Servants, and even the baptized males have made it clear that they're not really interested in becoming Servants. I don't know what to think somedays, it's a congregation in flux, but I can say with certainty that it will be around for a long time, just like the organization. The only question is in what form? I hope not to be around to say.
We've got some attractive sisters in our hall, and a couple of them are on that "waiting for the perfect brother" nonsense. The funny thing is they'll be waiting a long time which I getta kick out of. One in particular used to slighly insult me prior to becoming an elder. She'd make little passive aggressive comments and I'd insult her in kind. People used to joke with me that she had a thang for me which was proposterous to me because that's the way middle schoolers show their attraction. Ya know how it is in 7th grade, you want cop a feel, but at the same time you're not above beating her up either. That doesn't pass until around your early years in high school when you can't beat up bully girls anymore. Anyway, this girl left our congregation for a while to serve where the need is greater. In the meantime, I reached out, got appointed and was doing ok. A little afterwards, she came back, and you know she treats me like God's gift now? Real nice to me, soft spoken, it's really unsettling to say the least.
This is a strange organization.
